After Laughter

As my tears echo my heart's wails of pain, 
was the emergence of my thoughts; 
slowly crippling and crashing my soul.

These tears are empty, though.
They are from the deepest darkness of my unknown source of despair;
from an extreme feel of guilt and sadness that awakened my weakening conciousness.

The peculiar sensation of pleasure from this confusion
I catalyzed didn't make me any different from
a combination of sadist and masochist.
It is I who created this crumbling world,
and I unknowingly got fond of it.
Sorry, I have no choice.

Inside me are cries of help, thirsty for escapade.
Yet no one hears, nor listens;
no one reaches out, nor bothers to take a glimpse.
And so I held my knees closer and sobbed out of exhaustion.
Exhaustion from the cycle of misunderstanding.
Exhaustion from crying for help from a helpless world.

I just feel so empty.
And believe it or not,
I am fully clueless.
I feel extremely sad,
and I can't find any reason for it.
I didn't choose to be like this.
Yet a force tells me to be so.

I am getting exhausted.
Save me from this pit of hell.
Or I, will help myself, and it might be either bloody or bloodless.

- 2Pen